Friday, October 1, 2010
Dear Sister #7
Well, the ghostwriter sure doesn't keep us in suspense long.Elizabeth awakes from her coma after 12 pages, and is strangely concerned about her outfit and how she looks, rather then the fact that she just woke up from a coma. Jess is a little thrown off when Liz starts flirting with the doctor, and ignores her boyfriend Todd, but convinces herself that Liz is just a little shaken up from the accident.
Now the fun part starts! Jessica and Elizabeth basically switch places. Liz turns into mega-tease, dropping Todd, and going after every boy that breathes. They have a party for Elizabeth's homecoming, and Liz actually suggests that they just invite guys and forget about all the girls. I guess waking up from that coma made her a bit boy-crazy?
They have the party (girls included), and Jessica gets stuck with all the grunt work, replacing food and watching Liz flirt with everything in the room. Todd is humiliated by Liz at this party, watching her hang all over every guy except him.
Jessica takes on Elizabeth's dootmat role, and ends up cleaning up after the party by herself because Liz suddenly got a "headache" and had to go upstairs. It finally starts to click for Jessica that Elizabeth is acting just like Jess usually acts.
"If she's Jessica," she agonized "then who am I?"
Well we definitely can't have two Jessicas! I don't think anyone wants that.
Jessica keeps Elizabeth's irrational behavior to herself and doesn't tell her parents, which is pretty dumb, since this is obviously some kind of medical side affect from the accident, and Liz could probably use some medical attention.
The ever responsible Wakefield parents volunteer to watch their friends, the Percys, kids, a set of 12 year old twins (how nice, more twins!), and then leave Jess and Liz alone with the twins to go play bridge (ooh those partiers!).
Elizabeth and Jessica both have dates, but agree they'll figure out something because someone needs to be home with the Percy twins. Liz slips out and leaves Jessica alone-therefore stuck with the twins. Jessica is super pissed because she had a date with Danny Stauffer, and the front seat in Danny's car slides back AND reclines! No really, that is actually what she told Liz, I couldn't make this up.
So Jess is forced to drag the Percy twins along with her and Danny (I'm not sure why she didn't just cancel the date?), and of course it doesn't go so well. As Jessica tells her parents when they get home,
"Danny couldn't talk to me. I couldn't talk to him. It was the worst date of my entire life"
I'd have to disagree there Jess. Your date in All Night Long with Scott was much, much worse. And since when does she talk much on her dates?
She's mad at Liz, but quickly forgives her since she's now the doormat of the Wakefield family. Elizabeth continues to act like a cat in heat, and poor Todd is confused and has no idea what her problem is.
Everyone pretty much leaves the care of the Percy twins to Jessica, since she's now the responsible twin, and she ends up having to shuttle them around all day. She then gets a ticket, gets into a fender bender, and catches Danny with another girl at the beach!
But maybe things will get better for Jessica, because Lila has a fabulous party coming up!It's a costume party mixed with a "pick-up party", so everyone comes dressed up in a costume and....flirts with eachother. The book describes it like this:
"A lot of girls at Sweet Valley High who thought they were going steady found themselves without boyfriends after one of Lila's pick-up bashes, and a lot of girls who wanted to get rid of guys did it that night"
Lila's pick-up parties are another thing you never hear about again after this book, unfortunately. I would have liked to see more of those parties! Liz flirts like a crazy women, and all the girls start to get irritated with her for getting all over every guy. Funny, a lot of those girls don't complain much when Jessica does it.
Liz starts dancing with Bruce Patman of all people, and suddenly decides she sooo into him.They go on a little drive to Bruce's father's club and park. Bruce feeds her alcohol like the gentleman he is, and promises Liz ,while kissing her neck, "I'll take care of more then your neck" Ooh Bruce you know just how to turn a girl on.
Todd arrives just in the nick of time and punches Bruce out, then throws Liz's drunk ass into his car to go home. Liz calls him a "party pooper" and passes out. Hehe.
Surfer Bill Chase has suddenly decided he's in love with Elizabeth, (boy they really toss the word "love" around don't they?), and gets Todd's permission to ask her out (poor Todd!). She says yes, and proceeds makes a date with Bruce soon after forgetting all about her date with Bill. She runs off with Bruce, and Jessica greets Bill at the door and decides to pretend to be Elizabeth, because "why not?" Okay...
Bruce and Liz end up at Bruce's fabulous mansion, where Bruce tells her
"Let's go upstairs, I'll show you what love is all about:"
Like I said, they really throw the word "love" around in Sweet Valley.
In the meantime, Jessica is out with Bill, and decides this is her opportunity to get revenge on Bill, because he had the nerve to turn her down when she asked him out a little while ago. The absolute nerve of him! She's going to make him fall in love with her. Even though she's posing as her sister, who he's already "in love" with. Seems like a solid plan.
Back to Liz and Bruce. Bruce leaves the room, and Elizabeth trips and hits her head, suddenly snaps out of her Jessica-phase, and has no idea where she is or how she got there. This is no fun for Bruce, because when he gets back she's flipping out and demanding to leave. Bruce is so not having that!
"Oh no, you don't. You're going to give me what I want, what you promised"
What can I say? The man takes a promise seriously.
When Bruce tries forcing her, Liz bites him, (and it's kind of awesome), and Bruce is "whimpering and in no mood to cause any more trouble". Elizabeth tells him off
"Is that what all your big love stories are about, Patman? Taking advantage of girls who either don't know what they're doing, or are too drunk to care?"
Yup, you got it Liz!
Liz runs out of the house and finds Todd, and they have a touching reunion. All of Elizabeth's previous behavior is long forgotten and everythings perfect in Todd and Liz world again.
Surprisingly, Jessica's plan to make Bill fall in love with her works. She asks him if he loves her and what's so special about her, (he still thinks she's Liz), and after he answers her she informs him:
"Then you do love Jessica Wakefield, Bill, because that's who I am!"
Next book up is Heartbreaker, where we will be treated to more of the Jessica and Bill love saga.